*Screams*
Time: 1:17am
Drinking: Mt Dew
Listening To: Brad Paisley – Two People Fell In Love
Knowing: I should go to sleep :sleep::shocked:
Today was absolutely crazy. Nickolas was driving me up a wall. All day yesterday I wasnt feeling too well. I went to sleep for the night at 5pm. I had slept from 5pm until 8am. With the occasional waking up when Mike didnt do a good enough job of keeping Nick out of my hair. But thats alright…Nickolas is going through a MAJOR growth spurt, so for the past few days he’s had me in the kitchen making everything under the sun. That or he’s bored. I wish there was a way for him to go back to daycare during the day to keep him busy. There’s only so much I can do with him. I can let him play outside, but he hears the other kids and wants to play with them. I quite frankly, wouldnt like him playing with the children around here. They’re just not the type of kids I’d like him to be around (They’re allowed to do whatever they please, whenever they please.) Not, uh, I dont think so. I’m very stern when it comes to raising Nickolas. He’s a very well behaved little boy. Not many two year olds I know say, “Please, Thank You, God Bless You, Excuse Me, Your Welcome… etc.” So I gotta be doing SOMETHING right.
Anyways, my pills must’ve not been working good enough, along with being sick. Needless to say Nick got on my nerves today. As mean as that might sound to say that about your child, I just was very irritated. :evil: Aside from him asking for 300 different things to eat. He made a HUGE mess while eating everything. Anyways… I finally called my mom and asked her if she could please take him for a few hours or for the night. I needed a little time to relax. This was at noon. She agreed but said she had some stuff to do around the house then she’d come. I heard nothing from her until 30 of my calls later and until 4pm. She finally answered the phone. She fell asleep. By this time I was like, PLEASE JUST LET ME RELAX! So once Mike got home we went and dropped off Nick at my mom’s. (nana’s) He adores going over there.
Mike and I have been really stressed out lately. I extremely hate money. I got a letter from electric company stating that we have to pay the balance or we’re being shut off. I received a phone call from the cell phone company, and the cable company yesterday. I’m making a whole whopping $200 a month. They expect me to be able to pull the money outta my butt to pay these bills the second they call. :mad: Whatever. I’m doing what I can. Mike’s trying to help out the most he can. He’s worried about getting his truck fixed before the car breaks down completely and he has no way of getting to work. The rear axel spring is broken off completely so its only moments away from being undrivable. Along with all that, my wash machine is STILL broken. Its $100 some to fix the stupid part that broke. I gotta listen to my family whine about how they have no clean clothes for work or no clean towels. I’m sorry, why dont I just drop EVERYTHING I’m doing and go on my hands and knees and scrub the stuff in the bathtub then. I’m trying really really hard to get everything situated. I’ve been online A LOT lately. Hiding in my webdesign to get my mind off my problems. I tend to do this alot. When I’m the most stressed out, you’ll notice TONS of things happening around my sites. Its my way of calming myself and getting everything off my mind. My… “happy place” I guess you can say.
Mike gets paid tomorrow, so we’ll see what exactly will be paid and if I get my wash machine fixed. My parents usually help me during this time of desperate need. Unfortunally my dad had a massive problem with his shoulder in April and they thought it was a heart attack. He’s been off work ever since. So, he’s in the same predicument I’m in. :crying: I called CVS pharmacy yesterday. I had applied online a week or so back. The manager remembered my resume and said she kicked herself because she had no daytime positions opened. She said she was really interested in me, and if I was available during night time she’d hire me in a heartbeat. The problem with that is, 1. There are no daycares around here opened past 6pm. I’d be working until at least 10:30pm. 2. I could have Mike watch Nick while I go to work, but I dont know what I’d do with Nick for those 1-3 hours between he’s at work, I have to be at work. That and during “busy season” at Mike’s job (he works at buycostumes.com’s warehouse, busy season is halloween obviously) he’ll be working second shift to get extra hours and overtime.
So, let god hear my prayers. I’ve been down a hard road before. I’ve had many hardships in my life, this is just another hurdle you’re giving me to pass over. I understand life cannot be easy, but sometimes I wonder why its so hard.
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