It’s hard to say that one of your students is struggling while the other is performing well above average. That’s the conflict I am feeling.

We had Mikhail’s conferences last night. After waiting about 45 minutes his teacher was finally ready to see us. We walked in, sat down, and she looked us and suddenly gave us this entire faced grin. She chuckled a little and shook her head and said, “Mikhail is my dream child.” She proceeded to say it again a few more times, explaining how she wished all her students were as good as him. She said he listened and behaved and did everything he was supposed to do and he was just so good. This did but didn’t come as a surprise to Mike and I. We both knew he excelled in school but it’s one thing to think it and another thing to hear it first hand.

She explained his MAP test scores were WELL above average with getting an 87th percentile. She said the only reason why he was a level I reading group was because she ran out of time to test him but believes he’s a MUCH higher reading level than that! She explained there were six groups in her class ranging from Mikhail’s very high reading level to kids who weren’t even beginning to read. She said she had roughly 15 minutes to spend with each group and it wasn’t nearly enough time. She said that she really wished he got more time to spend with the “gifted and talented” teacher per week. (He currently sees her once a week along with two other students from his grade for his reading level.) She said now that she had the MAP scores she was going to talk to the “gifted and talented” teacher about working with Mikhail on math too because she didn’t want him getting bored in class and wanted to give him a challenge.

He was excelling at everything he did in school and she couldn’t say enough kind words to discuss it.

We came home and told Nick to go back to our house so we could explain to Lynn and George what the teacher said. We were beaming with pride. We were so proud of our little boy. We didn’t want to gloat or rub it in to Nick’s face though. Nick would have taken everything we said to heart. Everyone loves Mikhail more. Everyone cares more about Mikhail. Mikhail is the best kid. He would have thought those things.

Later on that evening he asked if we were going to ground Mikhail. I asked why? He said “Because if he got a bad conference you need to ground him like you grounded me. Oh wait. Nevermind. You never ground him.” I explained simply that Mikhail got a good conference and that there was no need to ground him for anything. Not because he was better than Nick but because he did nothing wrong.

I feel so conflicted about the whole situation. We got Mikhail who is excelling at everything school wise, and Nick who is truly struggling. I guess it’s a load off my back though because I only have to help one child in the education department. That’s one enough for me. I am not sure what I’d do if I had to pull both of them up from the ground.

I’m very proud of both my boys for each of their own reasons. Mikhail is doing great in school and getting good grades. Nick is pulling his head out of the clouds and working hard to get his grades up. He went from an F to a B- in science in no time flat. I know he’s able to do so much more than what he’s showing and he has some good potential to go far. He just needs to work towards it and try. I know he’s trying. I can see him trying. I admit I’m hard on him sometimes and I will tell him that he’s not trying at all because I know his capabilities are much higher than he’s leading to believe. I have to work on being more positive while rewarding Nick for what he’s doing instead of demanding MORE MORE MORE!

I am proud of both of them for each of their own reasons.

written on at 12:28 pm || Filed under: Accomplishments, Parenting

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