Christmas 2009
Well, Christmas 2009 has come and gone already. Can you believe it happened that quick? Next comes and goes the new decade. This Christmas was fairly enjoyable. The boys got a killing in presents. I’m not even kidding. I had no idea where to put everything. In fact, we had to resort their bedroom to ensure that they had room for it all. Most of its still under the tree waiting for a home.
Our Christmas traditions always include going to Mike’s families gathering at his Mom’s house on Christmas Eve, his parents for breakfast Christmas day after the boys open their gifts, my family that afternoon, then back at his parents house to eat more and gather all our presents. I was fairly happy with what I got. I did realize when I do get my prize winnings I’m going to go out shopping for more stuff for myself.
At this point, usually you read what everyone got… The list would go on and on this year. I don’t even know half of what the boys got. Nickolas got probably around 20 various board games, flash cards, Buzz and Woody – and about 30 other Toy Story things, clothes, nerf gun, books, Leapfrog Tag Reading system and (4) books for that, more clothes, a new winter coat… seriously this list just goes on and on… Mikhail got just as much.
I got a pajama set, a Mickey Mouse hoodie from Disney World, $10 Starbucks gift card. Mike bought me a cast iron grill frying pan. I also got tons of various scrapbooking stuff, a laminating machine, and a paper filing thing.
… can I just post the pictures? I think I shall …
So, hopefully that works. It seriously just took that over an hour to upload/crunch all those photos. If it doesn’t work I’ll just link my public link for Facebook.
Not everything about Christmas was enjoyable…
So, something that really irritated me with Christmas was this – My family said I was “damn depressing”. This was a direct quote -
“I ask myself, do I really want to do this? I read your facebook status updates and I just feel fucking depressed and down. God girl, don’t you ever have a good thing to say, or a good day for that matter?”
Now, I want to remind you, this is not the first time in the past few weeks I’ve heard this. As a matter of fact, I heard it probably over 10 times, from 10 different people the past couple of weeks. It really makes me think to myself… I suck. I can’t help I’m a “negative person” nor the fact that I feel as though I’m depressed. I mean, c’mon! There’s nothing I can do about the shitty stuff that continues to happen – I TRY to think of the positive side of things, but more times than not, I am unable. So, that really made me feel crappy about myself. My family thinks I’m a depressing person, to the point they don’t even want to read my FB statuses – FML … I know people keep saying “Fuck ‘em, its your status messages. If they don’t like it, then they don’t have to read them.” While I agree 100% with that, I also agree that something needs to change because all I do is whine and complain about the bad things in my life…
This is how I look at it – I blog when I’m upset. It’s one of those things I do to try to get it off my mind and to help me vent… Most of the time, I’m too lazy to write an entire blog regarding it, so I update Facebook with my latest anger. I don’t do it for attention, or to irritate anyone, but to simply vent my feelings. Another quote from yesterday…
“Its like, its the end of the world if you don’t have any money, but everything is fine and dandy when you do. I’m not allowed to have a good day because as soon as I read it, I just feel damn sad.”
… I don’t know why this bothers me as much as it does, but it REALLY bothers me, a lot. I wish I wasn’t this way. I wish I was able to see more positives than negatives. It’s what I know. I was doing really good with seeing the positives for a while, but its just so much easier to vent the negative and be done with them than sit there and go over and over in my head what the postives are, lying to myself to make me feel better. Vent and be done… or go on and on? *sigh* I don’t know.
Anyways, all and all, it was a fairly good Christmas. The boys got everything they needed even with the lack of Child Support Matt is willing to pay. I haven’t bought Mike’s present yet but I will be doing so as soon as I get my check. I went Christmas Clearance shopping today but we didn’t barely get anything. I planned on getting a ton of wrapping paper and ribbon and stuff, but *shrugs* I figure I’ll wait until it goes to 75% off and get whatever then.
How was your Christmas? What was your favorite gift this year?
Man, that really makes me rage, whoever said that shit to you.
I mean, sure, you have a point — Being negative all the time isn’t exactly heavenly. But then again, being super fucking fake and sugary all the time isn’t, either.
Plus, did they really have to lay that on you on CHRISTMAS DAY? FFS.
Excessive profanity, I know, but I am seriously raging. Ugh … Block ‘em all on FaceBook. :P Or, if you really wanted, you could create a separate ‘Internet Buddies online’ FaceBook account …? Then you could pretty much vent as much as you wanted without fearing you’re making someone ‘have a bad day’.
Seriously, that pisses me off. The person reads your statuses and they’re down? That’s all it takes?
They should try living with bipolar disorder — They’d probably collapse.
Not impressed, man.
However, I am impressed with your layout — It’s so sweet and cute! You did an awesome job on it, IMO. =)
Nikkole Reply:
December 26th, 2009 at 9:03pm
Thanks so much Mallory! I agree it makes pretty much anyone who knows me rage that someone could said something so mean like that to me – it was my own family. Aunts & Uncles… whatever. I decided to place all my “lovely family” on a specific list on Facebook – you can customize lists on your friends lists – and block them for certain update statuses – Which is one of the newest features with their latest update. So, whenever I feel the need to post whatever I feel like, negative or not, and don’t want them to read it all I have to do is set customized settings for that specific post. Viola! Don’t have to worry about “ruining their day”.
Isn’t that some shit though? Like seriously, that’s my WHOLE point about this entire thing – I don’t sugar coat shit. I don’t “play happy” and I say whats on my mind. I’m not fake. Quite frankly, I’m the most honest person around. If that means I say something that displeases someone, so be it. This is who I am, if you don’t like it, then maybe you don’t really know me. Go ahead believing the version of me you want, but this is who I am. I am negative. I have a rough time with stuff. I wear my heart on my sleeve. I am an open book.
Also, thanks for the compliments on the new layout. I worked EXTREMELY hard on it and I’m glad it paid off!
Sometimes people just don’t understand that what they say can hurt. :( I’m glad you had a good Christmas! I did too! My fave gift…my class ring, and an organic nail care kit and the InStyler. Its really cool! My ring looks awesome…but I left it @ my grandmas! :( I’ll be blogging about those three gifts soon if you wanna check them out!
@Nikkole: Yeah, I saw you posting about how you were working on the layout on Twitter, and I was like, ‘Damn! This girl’s working harder on a layout than even I do!’ And this is somethin’ else, because I take forever to make layouts … But I stretch the work out over days and days. You did it all at once, and I was a bit jealous, actually. My patience doesn’t last long enough, I don’t think. O_O;
And good for you, putting your family on a special FB list — I had no clue Fb had so many privacy features, haha. For things like this, it sounds magnificent, but when you’re just a curious person online, wanting to learn more about another random person online, it sucks, because like, everything’s blocked, haha.
FB is totally not about making friends, IMO, it’s like only staying in touch with people you know in real life. This is why I don’t have one, myself. xD;
Ah, but I’m ranting on and on. Apologies. e__e;